Summer Fog

I think I had alcohol poisoning over the weekend. My brother managed to get me when I just arrived home in the pouring rain, I remember his scoldings in my ear while I was bent over the table in the front yard, getting sick into a plastic bag. I managed to stumble into my room, wash up before passing out, but yesterday was truly the real hell for me.

I slept the entire day as staying upright was too much for me. I woke up at 11am and threw up some unidentified liquid. Even my piss smelt like vodka!? I naively concluded that I would be fine in a while, so I drank some water and went back to sleep. I woke up in a hour's time and felt sick again. Thereafter I found myself throwing up my stomach acid and possibly some bile which left a terrible aftertaste in my mouth. Next, I showered to feel make myself feel more human again. By then it was half past 1, and I thought I should have some lunch to settle my stomach. I dragged myself to the dining table and tried not to gag at the smell of fried tofu and fish, stir-fried vegetables. I stuck 2 chopstick bits of rice into my mouth and decided that I should lie down instead. My mother immediately tsk-tsked me and blamed our maniac mixing of alcohol on saturday night for my illness. I couldn't tell her that it was the extra bottle of Belvedere which I've ordered further in the night, that really killed my liver and other organs.

Anyhow, I returned to my room and fell asleep shivering under my duvet, when it was actually terribly warm outside. I woke up at 6pm and felt really hungry. I ate twice as much of the steamed rice as i had at lunch and as much fish as I could stomach before I felt sick. The taste of vegetables still made me gag, so I drank some orange juice for rid my mouth of the taste and went back to sleep after that. It was that intense. I felt better only this morning after yet another period of 12 hours fitful sleep. My kind parents gave me the morning off work, just in case. It still took me some effort today to concentrate at work, but otherwise I think I should be fine now. I'll definitely stay away from alcohol for a while now though, even if I didn't fall flat on my face or throw up on anyone.

While I was drifting in and out of consciousness and trying to reply my concerned friends' texts yesterday, he occupied most of my thoughts as I tried to will the sickness away. Sort of in the manner of how your life flashes past you at the moment before you die? It was weird and it reminded me of how I was alone, helpless and terribly sick with tonsillitis, bed ridden in my hazel farm dorm room. At least I had his concern for support then, while I only have a faded feeling of sadness now. Ironically, I hate how lousy I sound all the time on this blog, when I was genuinely happy on Friday and Saturday night with my friends. Maybe I should avoid getting myself into such unfortunate scenarios in the future, which are only too easy for me to fall into the whirlpool of unnecessary memories. But trust me, I've been trying.